I miss you...still...and I hate it...

Why do I still miss you so much...is it just because I'm lonely? Or is it you? It's been five months already! What the hell?! The last few days I've been fighting myself to not text you. What did you do to me? Did I have a similar effect on you? I know you truly cared and loved me...but do you miss me? I guess I know that you think about me since our coincidental run-in down in the parking garage. Why were you here? Why can't you just come out and say it? How do you have no good explanation? Did you know that ever since you broke up with me that's all I've dreamed about? I've always hoped that you would show up at my house wanting me back and telling me how sorry you are and that you love me and need me in your life. But that's not exactly how it happened...we saw each other and you freaked out and drove out...
It's weird because I just realized that since you did your little drive-by, I haven't dreamed about you. I used to dream about you almost every night. What does that mean? Part of me thinks that we were meant to see each other that night....like maybe we're meant to be. But you couldn't even man up and tell me exactly what brought you to me. Susie says that the universe brought us together again that night to tell me that, yes, you do think about me and miss me.
That makes me feel better...but at the same time it doesn't. Because if you miss me, (enough to be a weirdo and drive by my house) then why couldn't you just say it? Or I guess it's not enough to realize how great I am to have in your life...
It's weird because every time someone found out that we were together, they would tell you that I'm too good for you.
Maybe that was true...but you were so special to me. Even though you have issues...so do I...we all do...but I still loved you for you...
I know our break up had nothing to do with me...it really was you...but I was willing to be by your side...I don't know...
this is a waste of time because I've gone over it time and time again...and it's the same thing...
I miss you

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